Ralphie Eats Soap

28 Spanish Swear Words And How to Use Them


So…I know what you’re thinking, “Dude, this isn’t an Ocho List”…Nope, it’s a veinte y ocho list. That’s like, 20 times better than an Ocho list. Anyway, a few weeks ago Miguel Largo had a post about 125 Spanish words that can help you in Panama. I thought to myself; “Self, you should do a post about DIRTY words that can help you in Panama”. And there you have it…Backstory, and Spanish Swear Words!

Enjoy these Dirty Spanish Swear Words, dudes. Use with caution. Keep away from small children. Do not consume with alcohol. Side effects may include but not be limited to: bloating, indigestion, heartburn, acid re-flux, cramping, hemorrhaging, diarrhea, constipation, anal leakage, fatigue, nausea.

And now…your Spanish Swear Words from Panama

 EnglishSpanishUsed in a Spanglish Sentence
1Shut upCallateYOU: Callate, I can't hear the music from the open trunk of that car that parked right beside us.
2D!ck headCabeza de picoFRIEND: You callate, cabeza de pico, how can you NOT hear it?
3D!ck faceCara de picoYOU: I know, I was being sarcastic, cara de pico.
4A$$ faceCara de culoFRIEND: Pfft, whatever, cara de culo.
5DouchebagAwebaoYeah, that PanamaDude guy is a total awebao!
6homo/queer*nianio (actual spelling is nano with tildes above the n's).I realize it's politically incorrect to use these words, but if it really bothers you, seriously, stop being a nianio.
7BallsCojones (huevos in Panama)Damn, it's hot in Panama - my cojones are always sticking to the sides of my legs!
8Son of a b!tchHijo de putaIt's a crummy commercial. Hijo de puta!
9Son of a d!ckHijo de la vergaHijo de la verga! That guy just cut me off!
10A$$holeCabron/pendejo…I walk around in the summertime saying "how about this heat", Soy un pendejo-io-io-io-io-io...Everybody, P-E-N…D-E-J-O…
11$#!TMierda (a favorite here on PanamaDude)What's that smell? Did you mierda yourself or something?
12Kiss my a$$Besame el culoYou think I'm an awebao? Well, besa me el culo, cara de pico!
13F**K (or Dammit)MaldicionYOU: Maldicion, there's a checkpoint up ahead. Maldicion! I don't have my passport on me! MALDICION! I don't have any money to pay them off!
14F**kingMalditaYOU: This maldita sucks.
15F**k YouMaldito Seas / PudreteFRIEND: Glad I'm not driving.
YOU: Maldito Seas.
16B!tchRameraFRIEND: Looks like you might going to jail to be someone's ramera.
17What the F**k?Que carajosYOU: Dude, que carajos?
18Pu$$y*Chucha (is used in place of "ah shit")Chucha, that wave just kicked my culo!
19Go to HellVete a infiernoYou think I'm an awebao, well, besa me el culo y vete a infierno…cara de pico!
20Stupid IdiotEstupido Idiota (or Idiota estupido)No, that PanamaDude isn't an awebao, he's an idiota estupido…Maldicion!
21$lutZorraHmm, when a word ends in an 'a' it's female and in an 'o' it's male, so if ZORRA is slut, does that mean ZORRO is a male slut?
22B@stardBastardoIn ancient Egyptian medievil archaic viking times, when a woman had a child out of wedlock, the child would be considered a "bastardo". #TrueStory
23Chicken BrainMente de PolloWIFE: You forgot our anniversary again.
YOU: Sorry wife, I guess I have mente de pollo.
WIFE: That's okay husband, pretty soon you'll also have huevos azules.

And now, in honor of the late great George Carlin, here are the 7 words you can’t say on television…in Spanish!

 George CarlinJorge Carlin
-$#!TMierda
24Pi$$Mear
-F**KMaldicion
25C*ntMota (fans of the show Weeds may recognize this as the same word for marijuana…and you're right, in Mexico, it is the same)
26C@cks*ckerChupa verga
27Motherf**kerHijo de puta
28T!tsTetas

George Carlin

This list would not have been made possible if not for the help of my Spanish teacher, Edison…#E_Rod…And ladies, he’s single, he likes beisbol, and futbol, and longs walks on the beach.

Later Dudes!

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