Where we live,
there’s a there was a teak forest right beside our front porch. Apparently, in the dry season all the leaves would fall and blow over into our yard and become a three foot tall snow drift-like pile of leaves. I can only imagine how much that must suck to have to rake all the teak leaves – they’re huge, like the size of your head. Not my head though. I have a tiny melon, seriously, I do. Kid’s hats fit me better than adult’s, and I’d wear them but they have smaller brims so it becomes obvious I’m wearing a kid’s hat. Then people would probably look at me and wonder “WTF, what’s with that dude wearing a kid’s hat”?
Funny Things That Happen in Panama
So for the past three weeks, Panamanian “lumberjacks” have been “thinning” the teak forest. Actually, they totally decimated it. Now I’m no “lumberjack”, in fact, the only time I’ve held a chainsaw was when someone left a broken one in a house we had bought; however, I’m pretty sure that when you fall trees, you don’t fall them into other standing trees that you also want to cut down in order to SELL! That just seems a$$ backwards.
I will say this though, these guys are pretty effing strong! They could wear kid’s hats and people probably wouldn’t make fun of them. There’s no machinery to pull the timber out of the woods here. Just good ole fashioned manual labour. The small timbers weigh anywhere from 150-250 lbs and are carried out by one guy. The big timber (money logs) weigh around 400-500+ lbs and are carried out by two guys. Screw Crossfit – just become a logger in Panama!
But just when I’m about to credit these dudes, they bring themselves back down. Each of the past four mornings we have received a good dousing of rain. So what did these “Lumberjacks” decide to do? They thought it would be a perfect time to back a shipping container into the remnants of the forest and load their lumber. Okay, quiz time. Rain + Dirt = ? Now add one heavy a$$ truck and you get???
It’s definitely been our main source of entertainment. Sometimes we’ve been shocked and awed more than Operation Shock and Awe. Other times, it’s been funnier than…something you might find really funny. Dammit, why can’t I come up with analogies? Was there an Analogy class I missed in school or something?
Oh I’m a Lumberjack and I’m okay.
I break my back for twenty bucks a day!
That’s no joke, these guys probably make about $20 a day doing this kind of $#!T.